How to Deal with Chinese People (Episode 2): Understanding Chinese Indirect Communication
If you have ever felt confused when talking to Chinese people, you are not alone.
Many foreigners say:
“Why don’t Chinese people just say what they mean?”
This article will help you understand the Chinese indirect communication style — a key part of navigating friendships, travel, and business in China.
1. Chinese Culture Values Harmony
In China, keeping harmony (和谐) is more important than expressing strong personal opinions.
People try to avoid conflict, embarrassment, or making others uncomfortable.
So instead of saying “No, I disagree.”
A Chinese person might say:
- “Maybe we can try another way.”
- “It might be a bit difficult.”
- “Let me think about it.”
These actually mean: “No.”
2. The Concept of “Saving Face” (面子)
“Face” is extremely important in Chinese communication.
Losing face means feeling embarrassed, criticized, or disrespected in public.
Therefore Chinese people often:
- avoid direct rejection
- use softer language
- say something politely instead of directly
Examples foreigners should know
| What Chinese Say | Real Meaning |
|---|---|
| “Maybe later.” | No, not possible. |
| “I’ll try.” | Probably not going to happen. |
| “Let’s see first.” | No, but softly. |
| “It might be difficult.” | A polite rejection. |
3. Chinese People Read Between the Lines
In Western culture, communication is “low-context”: people say exactly what they mean.
In China, communication is “high-context”: people rely on:
- tone of voice
- body language
- relationship level
- social situation
- how things are implied
Understanding the context is often more important than the actual words.
4. How Foreigners Can Communicate Effectively
✔ 1. Don’t expect a direct yes or no
If the answer sounds vague — it usually means no.
✔ 2. Ask open, friendly questions
Instead of “Can we do this?”
Try: “Is this convenient for you?”
✔ 3. Watch facial expression and tone
A gentle smile + “It’s a bit difficult” = polite rejection.
✔ 4. Give people a chance to “save face”
Avoid pushing or questioning aggressively.
Give people time to think.
5. Real Example: A Business Meeting
Foreign businessman: “Can you deliver by next Monday?”
Chinese partner: “Monday… maybe a little tight.”
Foreign meaning: “Maybe still possible.”
Chinese meaning: “Impossible. Can we choose another date?”
Conclusion
Chinese indirect communication is not about hiding the truth —
It is about respect, harmony, and relationships.
Once you understand this, communicating with Chinese people becomes much easier and friendlier.